Wednesday, April 27, 2005


During the unfortunate hiatus of his Star Wars appearances, we witnessed the Wookie's unfortunate venture into commercial television. Wookie Cop was an abject failure, while the 1980 "What You Talkin' 'bout Wookie" was slightly before its time and subject to the whims of those coquettish writers, our favorite hairy almost ape-like but oh so human Wookie slipped into a deep depression of too much Jagermeister and gin. Luckilly, someone saw the lucrative value of the Star Wars venture and made The Empire Strikes Back, probably the best of the whole series and devoid of absolute control from certain parties that will go unnamed.

Wookie rode high on his renegotiated salary for the next two Star Wars films. Like his co-stars Mark Hamill, and Carrie Fisher he avoided any real work and enjoyed the massive Star Wars payout.

But payouts only last so long, especially for 20 minute at best side characters who's best line is "uh ohhhhhh ahhh eehhh" leaving your much more lucrative leading man, Harrison Ford, to say "Laugh it up, Fuzz ball!"

No respect.

And such was the fate of our Wookie. Left with his now millions which were quickly drunk away in so many vegas nights of too much whiskey and too many girls.

So left with little recourse, our Wookie found himself in the start of and the lowest dreggs of entertainment: the children's show: 1)broadband, 2)broadband who don't want to wait(it is really bad, I tell you what), 3)the handicapable, 4)the extra-handicapable (both very teensy, but the audio is good).)

Unfortunately for the Wookie, drunkeness is not a charming characteristic for childrens shows. Cancelled. Barney came on 6 weeks later.

Next up: Wookie hits bottom.


  1. The Wookie Saga continues. The audience awaits. I bet we would even wait in line for days.

  2. oh, the ignominy of the typecast wookie's fate

  3. Anonymous1:21 PM

    Perhaps it was delerium, or depression, or maybe just wishful thinking. But I swear the first year I lived in SL there was a restaurant up by the U (ex china star, ex brambery's (?)) that served big chimichanga type food, that was somehow connected to Hot Rod Hundley. I had no idea who he was at the time, and thought it was a fictional restraunteur/sports thing. I think there were caricatures all over the walls--speaking of that, remember EIBO's at trolley square? Mesquite grilled veggie burgers. --r

  4. I saw two life-sized Wookies at the market.

    Alas, no camera phone.